


glass hearts

by elysianseraph (femboy_hatake)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Meet the Family, Mutual Pining, Oblivious, Practice dating, Yachi Hitoka-centric, Yamaguchi Tadashi is a Good Friend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:13:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26551906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/femboy_hatake/pseuds/elysianseraph
Summary: the last thing yachi would expect is becoming a date escort upon entering her college. she also doesn't expect to like her job so much, or to be so good at since she's never technically been someone's girlfriend for real. nonetheless, she's always liked her line of work.when her closest friends, and subsequently the people she's been in love with for the last 9 years of her life, both decided to commission her for her specific area of dating expertise, she comes to learn that maybe things can't continue the way they have for so long. she isn't exactly sure what to expect.welcome to yachi hitokas dating serve or alternatively ; yachi and her glass heart.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio/Yachi Hitoka, Hinata Shouyou/Yachi Hitoka, Kageyama Tobio/Yachi Hitoka, Mentioned Tsukiyama - Relationship
Comments: 10
Kudos: 75
Collections: Haikyuu Rarepair Exchange 2020





	glass hearts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ChiaRoseKuro](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChiaRoseKuro/gifts).



> holy shit we made it! we really did it! 
> 
> a couple things i want to say before releasing this fic to the world
> 
> 1.) this is probably one of my most beloved fics to date. i poured my heart and soul into this motherfucker. i ate, slept, and breathed this thing since the start of may and i think i'm happy with it i now (i can;t say for sure i've been staring at it for MONTHS) but i think so. this fic really cemented my love for this dynamic and chained me to rarepair hell and im just really happy with it. special thanks to my partner who helped me edit and nursed me through the writing process like i was a baby bird. 
> 
> 2) hello to my giftee, Chro! this is my first time committing myself to an event of this nature and i was super nervous. i ended up picking these three and just ran with the fake dating trope because it just kinda clicked in my brain that way. i've been peeping your social media and i know that you've taken a hiatus for your health in which i wish you all the best. 
> 
> this fic was made with you in mind, and if you get a chance to read it while you're resting - i do hope that you enjoy it and that it can brighten your spirit just a bit! please look after yourself and be well <33 my heart goes out for you!! 
> 
> that's really all i have to say!! thank you to everyone who leaves kudos and comments. i hope you fall in love with these three like i have by the end of it, haha.

Yachi is warm. 

Truthfully it’s the only sensation she can focus on. She’s drunk on sake and exhaustion and her whole body feels warm - her sweater feels prickly on her skin. She would take it off, but she worries about getting weird looks so she doesn’t. She stares lazily at Yamaguchi whose decided to lay his head in her lap and Tsukishima who sits too close to her, and just stares out the window. Tsukishima has a flush on his skin - clearly also drunk but likely the most sober out of the three of them 

“Thank you,” his voice is unsteady when he speaks. Yachi blinks dazedly a few times then turns her head to look at Tsukishima who borderline refuses to meet her eyes. He stares out the window, unsure of what to say. It’s the first time he’d addressed her without Yamaguchi being there tonight so she doesn’t know how to reply. She also doesn’t know  _ exactly _ what the thank you is for, though she has an idea. She watches as Tsukishima sighs, steadying the glasses that hang on his nose bridge before deciding to take them off. 

“I know it’s kinda your job - in a way, but I know you didn’t have to come,” Tsukishima says awkwardly. Yachi still has no clue what to say, but it doesn’t seem like Tsukishima is finished so she stays quiet “We haven’t fought like that in so long. I didn’t know what he was thinking about bringing you with us. I was mad about it at first but,” 

He finally gains the courage to meet her eyes and the look of gratitude written all over his expression makes her a little choked up. Tsukishima has quite obviously grown up in the years past graduation but it’s the little moments like this where he swallows his pride that makes Yachi feel particularly compelled. She gives her best smile, and watches Tsukishima steady. He would be uncomfortable if it was anyone else - but it’s Yachi. Yachi never has anything but sincere intentions and Tsukishima isn’t an asshole anymore. Though he could never really be an asshole to her before anyways. 

It makes it easy on Tsukishima to accept her acceptance. So he does his best to mask the intense emotions reeling in his face, and nods gratefully. 

“I sent the money to your phone. It’s more than you charge but,” 

Yachi doesn’t make him speak anymore than he has too and instead offers another warm grin. She just shakes her head, running her fingers through Yamaguchi's hair. Tsukishima genuinely feels no jealousy towards her and that alone is enough to send him back to staring out of the window. Yachi ignores his blush for his sake and the rest of the ride is comfortably silent. 

Yachi isn’t very sober, but she doubts it's the alcohol that's giving her this sense of relief. She can’t help but close her eyes and mull over the night - but none of the details leave her unsettled like she expects. A ping in her phone with a little over 25000 yen makes her laugh and wakes her up but she’s quick to fall back asleep. 

This wasn’t an unusual part of her job, in all truth. Her job wasn’t all that usual in the first place, but when couples hire her - she can almost always expect that she’s the mediator for the night. She can’t say for sure she thinks she’s doing a good job but it’s evidenced by her bank account that she’s doing  _ something _ . Tonight was rewarding more than it was tiring - maybe because Yachi knows the two people who called on her so intimately. 

She laughs mildly at the ridiculous line of work she indulges in. She isn’t sure there’s a formal word but if she had to give it one - she’d probably call herself an escort. Maybe a better word is date-for-hire but it’s not as easy to say - though it’s worlds more accurate. Escort implies sexual encounters and Yachi hasn’t had a single one related to her job in the 3 years she’d been doing it. It was sincerely just work - a  _ weird _ kind of work that she fell into in her freshman year. 

Even just recalling the situation is strange. The details are almost unclear, but the major arc of the story was that a friend needed a plus-one to a wedding. He asked Yachi and asked if she could pretend to be his date, just for the night - offering her a hefty sum of cash that broke, freshman Yachi couldn’t refuse. He was her senior by about two years but he paid for the dress that she wore. 

According to him, Yachi was damn good at her job. 

She didn’t take it seriously at first, because who would? She wasn’t all that sure what to do with the information, mostly planning on saying her embarrassed thanks and calling it at that. Instead, she has a vivid memory of said person holding her shoulders, and shaking her - looking intensely through her. 

“Yachi-san, listen,” his voice was so serious. Yachi was in too much shock to be nervous, but she does as he asks “You could seriously make some money like this. I know people who need dates for stuff all the time - and you were great. I have a friend in my dorms who needs someone to meet the ‘rents so they get off his back about getting married,” 

He lets her go but didn’t break the eye contact. It sends shivers down her spine, even now. 

“Can I give you as a recommendation?,” He questions. Yachi just nods stupidly at the question, dumbfounded by the information that gets dumped on her right then, before he gives her a pat on the shoulder and sees her off. She sat in complete silence in the library after that. Questioning whether or not this was, in actuality, a simulation and if hers happened to have a major glitch. 

After that it was text asking if she was Yachi - and if she was down for the task. He offered her a similar amount of money with a similar amount of desperation and Yachi just couldn’t say no. 

Yachi isn’t an idiot though, either. She agrees to everything with terms and conditions - and they meet up in person so Yachi can ensure that nothing bad happens. She’s been honing her gut instincts since highschool after all and they never do her wrong - so she goes with it and everything goes as planned. She dresses pretty to meet a boy's parents, and together they get a story straight - and Yachi does her best to act like a proper, respectful girlfriend. 

She’d never… been anyone's girlfriend before. She just did what she saw in shoujo manga and hoped for the best, taking inspiration from her real life emotions. She kinda saw it as acting in a play, and in a weird way it was fun. She thought she’d have more hang-ups but there was something refreshing about the endeavor. It’s enjoyable to belong in a relationship that has no stakes. She finds humor in it because it’s not something she could’ve ever predicted for herself - especially not in highschool. 

She grew a lot since her freshman year of highschool - now able to calm herself through any bouts of anxiety and think more clearly. She’d also gained a great deal of confidence hanging out with a bunch of rowdy volleyball playing highschool boys who gave their all to make her feel at ease - people she could one day call close friends or distant ones. Friends all the same - and good ones at that. 

It’s only in college does Yachi realize how much of a complicated person she really is. She’d spent the last few years taking note of all of her different intricacies - though she’d never done much with the information. In many ways her blooming career as a girlfriend-for-hire gave her a chance to explore her emotions a little bit more. She explored herself in all the dates that followed - gaining a stronger sense of self in the meanwhile. She was more confident with a clear set of strengths and weaknesses. She doesn’t know much about anything, but she likes to think she knows herself well. 

For example, her mom made her good at dealing with other people's emotional baggage. No matter the situation, Yachi had an extremely natural ability to put people completely at ease. She doesn’t see herself as some saint but she knows that’s one of her strengths. Her childhood with a mother who was mostly absent also teaches her lessons about love that would follow her into her mid-twenties. Enough missed holidays and birthdays would teach someone about the importance of small things - the lingering understanding that one phone call during Christmas could’ve changed her whole life. 

Yachi spent most of her childhood folding herself up into something neat. Someone who tucks all the sharp, scraggly parts of herself in and never takes more space than she has too. Never putting too much burden on anyone to take care of her, but still loving unconditionally in hopes that someday she would feel the love back. Her life as a fake-girlfriend for people to show off gives her a few moments of that. She pretends to love unconditionally, and the circumstances provide opportunity for her to feel the love back for a little while. 

It sounds sadder than it is - and honestly, Yachi doesn’t want to think about her love life. Her heart has belonged to the same people for the last 9 years and there is little she can do now to change it, especially when those two people already love each other. Yachi loves them so much she doesn’t get sad about it anymore. She just accepts the circumstances and lives on. Lasting loving romance is a distant desire, but it’s good inspiration for work. All of those details make her astoundingly good at her job. 

She smiles as she lays her head on the window, blowing some air through her nose. She would be giggling at how ridiculous it is but she’s too tired. Slumping her head against the window, she sleeps. Endlessly dreaming of nothing in particular except for the two people who appear in those dreams regularly. 

_

Rich, golden sunlight floods through Yachis curtains on Saturday morning. Her head hurts, just a little bit as she wakes up but her hangover is mild at worst. Sleep threatens to lure her back in the second she gets up, so she sits up immediately. Her senses flooded with the smell of breakfast and coffee from her shared apartment - she swings her legs over the side of bed with a yawn. She shuffles into the bathroom but there are quiet chatters from the kitchen - but it isn’t loud enough for her to tell who it is. Her immediate assumption is Tsukishima since they came home together last night so she doesn’t concern herself with looking too nice. 

She brushes her teeth, washes her face, and brushes her hair before clipping back any loose pieces. It’s much longer now, reaching a little past her shoulders. She’d been meaning to get a trim but she can never find a good time. Changing out of her old PJ’s and into a clean set, she makes her way towards the kitchen. 

“Morning Tadashi,” She’s not exactly paying attention when she says it, but her comment is followed by an unusual bout of silence that makes her open her eyes a little wider. When she gets her bearings, the two people she least expects are sitting at the kitchen island with a plate of breakfast. 

At the counter, both Kageyama and Hinata have turned their heads to meet her gaze with smiles. Kageyama's smile is more subdued but impossible to miss, and Hinata is just as bright as she’d always remembered it to be. She’s flooded with both joy, and intense relief upon seeing them. The effect is enough to make her knees weak, cupping a hand over her mouth - now hung open in shock. 

“Hiiii,” Hinata says in a singsong voice. Yachi walks over to them slowly, hugging them both at once before ruffling their hair with a deep, content sigh. She knew they were coming back to Japan soon but she hadn’t expected it to be so quickly. Both Kageyama and Hinata take a second to revel in the small affectionate gesture unbeknownst to Yachi who takes a seat at the empty third seat. Her bare legs bump against Kageyamas, who blushes furiously - not that Yachi can actually tell. 

“You guys should’ve said something,” she says with a sigh “I look terrible right now,” she pouts. Both boys frown at her comment. 

“You look fine, don’t be ridiculous,” Hinata assures. Yachi smiles at that sleepily, opting not to reply and reaching for the cup of tea that Yamaguchi sets out for her to eat. She watches as Yamaguchi cooks breakfast, whispering quietly to Tsukishima and letting the 3 of them talk on their own. She appreciates it silently - Yamaguchi is the only person who knows about her feelings in detail. 

“I’m glad you guys are visiting but what brings you here so early?,” Yachi asks, taking a sip of her tea before shivering a little. It’s warmer than she expects and it startles her “I mean - it’s okay of course. But shouldn’t you have rested a bit first? I know it’s off season, but you have to take care of yourself still,” she scolds gently. All these years later and she’s still the only person who cares enough to do so. They both exchanged looks - but surprisingly, it’s Kageyama who opts to speak. 

“We need..to talk to you,” he explains vaguely. Hinata shoots him a glare. There isn’t much else to say in totality - he really can't be mad. Upon the realization, Hinata sighs but nods in agreement anyways, looking at Yachi who looks at both of them over the edge of her mug. 

“What this idiot said. Could we talk to you after breakfast, yanno - alone?,” Hinata explains. Yachi tilts her head in confusion but of course nods anyways. She’s curious about what they could possibly both have to say to her, but pushes away the questioning thoughts after her belly rumbles. She gasps in embarrassment when they both laugh affectionately. 

“Fine,” Yachi says with a blush “That’s fine,” 

Yamaguchi puts breakfast down in front of her wordlessly, with a knowing smile playing at his features as he takes a seat next to Tsukishima. 

_ 

She never gets used to having them in her bedroom. Even as an “adult,” having the two people she liked alone with her kinda sends her short-circuiting. But they’re here nonetheless, while Yachi is sitting in her big office chair at her desk, they were seated on her bed. 

There’s no gap between them. It makes Yachi smile to see the two of them be so comfortable with one another in her presence. It’s the little things like that keep her going, she thinks as she folds herself up into her chair. Her shorts ride up as she does, tucking her knees to her chest before resting her chin. She looks at both of them curiously. She pouts.

They’re doing the thing. 

“Stop making weird faces at each other and just tell me,” she says with irritation. Both of them jump at her callout. She’s had more than enough time to figure out their annoying quirks and doesn’t flinch over it these days. To her surprise, it’s Kageyama who goes to speak first again. 

“We need to date you,” 

…...

Silence. Yachi blinks a few times, trying to process the words as Hinata flicks Kageyama's forehead with a blush. 

“Tobio, you -,” Hinata is about to tear into Kageyama before he senses Yachis distress and decides that’s more important “What he means is that we need your... work experience,” Hinata explains awkwardly. He immediately covers his face as Kageyama scoffs.

“How is that better?,” 

“Shut up,” 

Yachi feels relief, taking a deep breath before falling into giggles. Both of them pause to look at her - watching her clutch her stomach in laughter. Neither of them speak as they just... take her in. She’s pretty always but especially when she laughs.

“What's so funny,” Kageyama mumbles out. She opens her eyes, pausing her laugh for only second before doing it all over as she shakes her head.

“I really missed you both,” Yachi says warmly. Neither of them can find anything good to say, so Hinata says what's on their mind. 

“We missed you too,” Hinata pipes up. All Yachi does is smile, and Kageyama coughs to suppress the onslaught of emotion of seeing her again after all these months. Hinata pretends not to notice. 

“Glad to hear it. What do you need me for, though?,” Yachi asks again. Kageyama goes first, his awkward demeanor having shed and now replaced with a mildly serious expression. 

“The Adlers are doing a charity event,” Kageyama says with a sigh “I’m being auctioned off as a date,” 

Yachis eyes widen as she waits for him to continue. He shifts uncomfortably where he sits and places his face in his hands. 

“The only person I’ve ever taken on a date is this dumbass and he doesn’t count,” Kageyama groans “From what he know - the woman whose supposed to be my date works with teams as a sponsor,” 

Kageyama looks at Hinata whose taken his hand comfortably in his as he sits up and looks at Yachi. She nods, face reddened and neck flush. She hopes they don’t notice. 

“I see,” Yachi hums “So you want me to show you how to take a woman on a date, right?,” Yachi confirms. Kageyama nods, looking away. 

“I’m not sure I’ll be the most help, but I’ll do my best,” Yachi says softly. She ignores the feeling of heat in her stomach and the dull ache in her chest. 

It’s a lot to take in, even just as a passing thought. They’re her friends, so she’s helping because any good friend  _ would _ do that… but to go on a fake date with someone she’s been in love with for so long just seems like a plan for misfortune. 

Yet she can’t find any good reason to refuse. 

She places a hand on her chest instinctively. A habit developed in highschool to soothe the pain that these feelings gave her. These days the pain is nothing but dull - a flat and light punch against the cage of her ribs. She’s felt it so many times now it went from a stabbing pain to a pressing on a bruise. She’s used to it, but it’s been a while since it’s stung so much. The whole thing is just pressing a bit too hard.

Kageyama watches her quietly as she stares into space - and his chest tightens. It’s quiet, a subtle silence falls over the room as Hinata holds Kageyama's hand in his own. Hinata smooths his thumb over the back of his hand. While Yachi stares into nothing, Kageyama and Hinata find a solace in the other. It’s hard to tell whose feelings are more complicated. 

Who can say for sure? Would you believe the couple if they told you that they’ve never said the words out loud? Instead the gap in their love had always had  _ her _ silhouette so someday the both of them just accepted it and focused on each other? 

Or is it harder to believe the two people you love most will always love each other so much more than they will ever love you - when in your life there’s no one who means more? The silence is comfortable but if you listen too long, it has just as many secrets. Still, with nothing left to say, they sit in it. 

Yachi speaks first, a thought occurring to her as she swallows the familiar lump in her throat. 

“You guys said you both needed to.. use my services,” she says with a chuckle “But Hinata never said why, so,” she trails off. Hinata lets go of Kageyama's hands and scratches the back of his head.

“You remember my great grandma right? You met her a few years back when you came to our family reunion,” Hinata probes. Yachi immediately breaks out into a smile. 

“The one who kept asking me if I had a boyfriend right?,” Yachi giggles. Hinata groans. His relationship to his immediate family and some cousins was good but the older generation of relatives were relentless about him getting in a relationship.

Eventually, Hinata had come out to his family and it went relatively smoothly. Most of them know Kageyama as his partner and it was fine - except great grandma who had missed the memo entirely. 

“Yeah, her. She’s pretty sick and last time I saw her - she insisted on seeing my girlfriend. Apparently she found out I was in a relationship and now she won’t stop calling me asking about when I’m getting married,” Hinata explains, irritated. Kageyama cracks a small smile at him. 

“It’s like she can’t actually understand that I’m dating a guy, but she’s old and has a foot in the grave so my mom said to try and figure something out,” Hinata whined. Yachi throws a pen at him and gasps.

“Shoyou, you can’t say that!,” Yachi says, falling out with laughs. Hinata's genuine confusion makes her laugh harder.

“What? It’s true! She sucks and I feel bad you’ll have to deal with it even for a weekend - but my mom requested it so,” 

“Your mom?,” 

Hinata smiles sheepishly, leaning back on his hand. He rolls his shoulders before settling his eyes again on the ceiling. 

“She said if I can’t think of anything else, to ask you. You know my mom and Natsu love you,” Hinata says warmly. Yachi blushes deeply at that. She won’t ever get used to that. Existing in their lives so presently makes her incredibly nervous. She looks down.

“I don’t mind,” Yachi says warmly. 

“Okay! It’s next Friday. It’ll just be the two of us,” 

Yachi yawns, stretching out her legs. Her shirt hangs over her shoulder, her petite frame showing the dip of her collarbones. 

“Sounds good,” she replies before shifting her gaze to Kageyama “What about me and you, Tobio?,” 

“Does tonight work?,” 

Hinata shoots his boyfriend a look, but Kageyama doesn’t seem to notice. Hinata ignores the jealousy and the fact that it isn't directed at Yachi. Yachi arches her brows, a little shocked but nods anyways. She isn’t busy, but nonetheless. 

“I don’t have anything fancy to wear,” Yachi says awkwardly. Kageyama stares at her momentarily, patting his pockets a few times. He pulls out his leather wallet, immediately handing Yachi… way too much fucking money. It’s only precisely 5 bills, four ten-thousand yen bills and one five-thousand. Yachis jaw drops as she starts sputtering, immediately trying handing the money back to Kageyama who looks entirely confused. 

“T-tobio, I can’t accept that,” Yachi sputters. Damn them and their athlete bank accounts. 

“Accept it as part of reimbursement for the date since the restaurant needs us to look nice,” he says easily, not really seeing the problem. Yachis hand trembles as she takes a deep breath, promising to return the money at a later date knowing there's no way Kageyama lets her give it back. She gives a small sigh

“Yeah, right - thanks, Tobio. I’ll try to look nice,” 

Another wave of silence falls before Hinata pipes up quietly. 

“How much should we pay you?,” he asks, voice soft. Yachi is taken aback by the question, shaking her head.

“Oh no, you don’t have to pay me. We’re friends ,” 

“Yamaguchi paid, didn’t he?,” Kageyama adds. Yachi looks surprised at them both, wanting to tell them it’s not necessary but it doesn’t seem like either of them are willing to compromise. 

“We can talk about it after, I guess. I normally charge based on the dates themselves, but I have a flat rate of a hundred dollars,” Yachi replies awkwardly. Both of them have a competitive glint in their eyes and Yachi is unsure of what exactly it’s for. Maybe it’s better not to ask. 

Yachi lets out a loud yawn, feeling shy at how sleepy she was with guests over. She scratches the back of her neck, as Hinata signals Kageyama that now would be a good time to leave. Kageyama nods silently. 

“You should sleep in since it’s a weekend, Yacchan,” Hinata suggests, standing up. Yachi follows the two of them out, shaking her head stubbornly. 

“Sorry you guys,”

“It’s fine, Hitoka,” Kageyama assures. They walk through the living room where Yamaguchi and Tsukishima have settled on the couch. Yamaguchi frowns at the, crawling out of his boyfriend's grip to see them off. 

“Leaving so soon?,” 

“Ah, yeah. We’ll come visit again soon, but Yacchan is sleepy,” Hinata replies. 

Yachi stands in the doorway as she watches Kageyama lace up his shoes - the conversation between HInata and Yamaguchi becoming white noise as she looks at him fondly. Yachi can’t tear her eyes away from his handsome expression, sighing softly. Kageyama meets her gaze as he stands up. His expression is still unreadable, like normal but there’s an imprint of a smile on his face. Lips upturned ever so slightly it’s hard to tell in the shadowy hallways. 

“I’ll see you tonight, Hitoka,” Kageyama mouths. 

“See you tonight,” she mouths back. 

Another pair of smiles are exchanged before Hinata is shuffling Kageyama out of the door. As soon as they’re gone, Yachi hits her head lightly against the nearest wall and hears Yamaguchi's sigh from the other room. 

What on earth was she gonna do?

_ 

“Tadashi - stop laughing,” her voice comes out in a whine as Yamaguchi turns the dryer off. He takes a brush through her dirty-blonde hairs, trying to suppress how funny he finds the situation before immediately starting to laugh again. 

“Do you realize how crazy it is,” Yamaguchi asks seriously. She looks at his reflection in the mirror with faux agitation. He pokes his tongue out at her and she laughs before pouting again. She feels like a child for being this whiny - she would argue it’s out of character for her. But, in this situation - what is left? The situation just keeps dawning on her. What would you do if the two people you were in love with both asked you to go on intimate dates with them when you know it doesn’t mean a thing? She’s basically going on a work dinner and a company trip. 

“Of course I do,” Yachi says, placing her elbow on the bathroom counter before resting her cheek on her palm. Yamaguchi hums as he continues to brush out her hair, silently searching around for the curler before sighing “But, it’s them, you know? There was nothing I could do,” 

“You could’ve said no,” 

Yachi looks at her housemate with a serious furrow in her brows. Yamaguchi doesn’t bother meeting her eyes, with a knowing smile on his face. She uses her hand to pinch his stomach through his t-shirt making him yelp. 

“You know for a fact I couldn't've,” she says exasperated “My heart is too weak for that,” 

“For them,” Yamaguchi corrects. Yachi groans again but Yamaguchi decides to console her a bit, massaging her scalp with some heat-resistant foam. She relaxes into her touch, as Yamaguchi sighs. 

“In all seriousness, you gonna be okay?,”

She doesn’t know how to answer. Doing such a favor for the two of them is just so… terrible. She’d spent the better part of her life drawing lines in the sand for their relationship, completely content in never undermining that. The boundaries between lover and friend never even crossed as a joke. It almost feels like she's throwing that hard work away. 

She stares at herself in the mirror for a few moments, laughing internally at how much effort she’d put in subconsciously to look nice. Her dress was blush-pink, with a little heart panel that shows her chest and a high-neck. She was wearing her nice jewelry, she shaved her legs, and Yamaguchi was doing her hair all proper. Normally dressing up for her work-dates was one of the fun parts of the endeavor - but now there were only worries if she was too dressed up. If she was trying too hard. If Tobio would even give a shit that she did. If Hinata would like the style of the dress. 

Yet despite all of that, she was strangely elated to spend time with him. Even if all he was doing when she got there was playing pretend, at least she’d be with someone she loved. She doesn’t know what is more frightening - how at ease being together made her feel or how much she leans on them to feel that way. Sometimes she forgets she’s actually in love. 

“I don’t know,” she answers honestly “I shouldn’t be this happy just seeing them,” Yachi comments. Yamaguchi looks at her sympathetically, partly because she was so sad but also because all three of them were insanely oblivious. If Yachi hadn’t asked him to keep it between them, Yamaguchi has half-a-mind to meddle. 

“But you know, I’m so excited to spend time with Tobio. And all week - I know I’m gonna think about seeing Shoyou, thinking about when I’ll see them together again. I didn’t even realize how much I missed them,” Yachi says with a saddened smile. Yamaguchi lets her continue, beginning to curl her hair and brush out the locks. 

“It’s just  _ so _ complicated now. I want to let go, just because that would make it easier on everyone, but when I see them,” 

“They’re all you think about, right?,” Yamaguchi finishes. Yachi nods, sighing. 

“You should tell them, Hitoka,” Yamaguchi advises “Even to just get it off your chest,” 

“It feels too late to do it, you know?,” 

She pauses, as her phone makes a sound. She leans over to read it as Yamaguchi places the last few berretts in her hair. Yamaguchi watches as she stands up, now a few inches taller. She smooths her dress down once, then twice, then another time before anxiously responding back. The two of them shuffle out of the bathroom, and Yachi immediately goes to explore her bag. She goes over the mental checklist of everything she needs before securing the bag over her shoulder. 

“It’s never too late to be honest, Hitoka,” Yamaguchi replies. Yachi looks at her roommate with a deep sigh, but nods. She smiles half-heartedly at him, pressing her lips together with a small smile. 

“Thank you,” Yachi says with a smile “See you later,” 

Yamaguchi watches her disappear from the door of their shared apartment with a deep sigh. All they need to do is talk to each other but it’s not like he can explain that to all three of them. Yamaguchi has faith in her, so he shakes his head and turns the corner into his bedroom. She’ll have to tell him later. 

__

“Sorry, did I keep you waiting?,” 

Kageyama’s mouth dries at the sight of her, his eyes peering up over her phone to see her under the streetlights. It’s dark enough to make it look like a halo, surrounding her endlessly with light. He watches her adjust pieces of her hair, giving him a small wave followed with a genuine smile. He doesn’t smile at strangers - it’s not easy or commonplace for him. He feels lucky that she’s anything but, because smiling comes easy for him when he looks at her. 

“No, not at all,” he pauses as she approaches, descending down a concrete stairwell like a makeshift princess. Or a real one. He can’t pick. 

“You look.. pretty,” he fumbles out. Yachi smiles at him, reaching out and patting his shoulder with a lighthearted laugh. He looks more handsome than normal, a distinct scent of cologne that hangs on his neck when he looks up. His hair is pushed back, parted in the middle - and the suit he wears is tailored. A gift he got from an executive, a year or so back. He doesn’t dress so nice for anyone. 

Well, except her. She’d always been an exception, in her own right. 

“Compliments are good on dates, Tobio,” her voice is light, almost teasing but mostly sincere. She only adjusts her tone that way for him - a reminder that it’s okay to relax a little. 

“Are you sure you needed my help?,” she offers the joke in jest. He huffs at that, a shiver running down his spine at the thought of doing something like this with anyone who isn’t her or Hinata and suddenly feels sick. His immediate frown sends her laughing as he opens the door for her. 

She swallows the urge to kiss the part of his hairline where it splits in the middle, and gets into the car. She doesn’t miss the way he mumbles out a small ‘yes’ in her absence - quietly getting caught up in her thoughts until the click of the car door wakes her again and her eyes blink a few times. 

“I’m not sure how I should guide you on this date,” she says thoughtfully “I know when it’s the real thing you won’t be picking her up, but think about maybe getting her some flowers,” she offers. 

He pauses at her comment, putting in the car into shift and driving down the road. His expression is once again furrowed, not taking his eyes off the road, 

“Should I have bought you flowers?,” 

The question feels like a gust of wind on hot skin. It relaxes her in the moments it comes but her eyes feel dry at the question, and she doesn’t know how to reply. It’s an innocent question, so she comes up with an innocent answer. 

“We’re just friends, so there’s no need,” 

Yachi feels flushed like she’s in highschool again. Kageyama stares out, his knuckles grip the steering wheel a little harder. He’s reconciling with the familiar frustration, the many things that come into his mind as he looks at the road - and at her, through his peripherals. They’ve both grown so much since then, but neither of them have the bravery to speak. 

He wants to say they’ve never really been just friends, right? He wants to ask if there's space in her heart for him, too. So many things are always left unspoken, and the worries about what will happen to the words if they don’t speak them keep growing. They’re just trying not to choke. 

He thinks of a careful reply, one that will suffocate his irritations - at least for the time being so he shakes his head. As if to say “That won't do,” and says the only thing he can think to say. 

“What flowers do you like, Hitoka?,” He asks thoughtfully. She worked as a florist part-time sophomore year, to get familiar with how to draw flowers for her design - and the subtlety of such a detail makes her shake. In the wording of such a small sentence. It’s always the little things. 

She pauses. 

Yachi looks at him, briefly. The passing lights that move as he speeds through the streets change the shadows on his skin, but he still looks so perfect in each one. She remembers it all very suddenly. How she loves him, and Hinata, and how much of her heart is missing - and comes to realize that there is no such thing as innocent questions or answers for her. 

She remembers what Yamaguchi said. She can always give honest answers, can’t she? 

She looks down at her lap, and her smiles equal parts somber as it is joyous. Emotions like these are always so complicated. It feels silly. Maybe it is. 

“Red carnations,” she almost whispers “Or striped ones,” 

He’s surprised by her quick answer. She lifts her chin, shaking the sadness from her expression and commits herself to giving herself just this once. She can be a little selfish, just this once - it's a recompense for all her hardship. That’s what she decides. 

“They remind me of you and Sho,” 

He nearly crashes into a car at the revelation. The fact that they remind her of anything like that, is enough to make him feel lightheaded. He focuses on the words, unsure of how to proceed. If only Yachi had been paying a little more attention. 

“O-oh?,” 

Yachi smiles. It’s a full one, with all her teeth. What they don’t know won’t kill them, so she nods and looks at him as he drives. They’ve come to a stop light, so he gets a chance to look back and Yachi just takes it all in. At least she can be there, like this, just for one night. It feels like enough for now. 

_

By the time it’s hit Yachi Hitoka that she’s on a date with a man she loves very much, with a boyfriend who loves him back - but is also one of her bestfriends, it is late enough in the evening that the two of them speak quietly to each other. 

It’s nice. It’s them. Quiet bouts of comfortable silence, broken with ease. It doesn’t bother either of them to speak or not to speak - a facet of their complicated relationship that only developed as they got older. Sometimes speaking isn’t necessary to the degree that people would believe - and her adoration for Kageyama has never been all that conventional. They enjoy each other's softened company. Yachi can speak if she so chooses and Kageyama always responds the best he can. Each party is putting in effort to be together.

It’s less complicated than it sounds. 

“I feel like I’m not doing a good enough job trying to teach how to be a good date,” Yachi says with a pout. Their plates just cleared up for the next course of the meal - Kageyama seems confused. 

“It feels like we’re just hanging out like normal,” Yachi says with a laugh “Not a proper first date with someone you’re trying to impress. I want you to get that sponsorship,” she ends with. Kageyama frowns, brow hardening before gazing up at her. 

“I like just this,” 

Yachi can’t help but feel her chest tight and she lightly squeezes his hand in reassurance. The gesture is so friendly - it can’t be read as anything else, but it sends Kageyama's heart racing anyway. 

“I like this too, Tobio but I should be a good teacher if you’re gonna be paying me, you know?,” 

He can’t seem to argue, so Yachi just goes on ahead with her points. 

“When you go on a first-date with someone, most of the time - people like to talk about themselves. So, when you meet the mystery lady for dinner, make conversation and ask about her,” Yachi says with a smile. 

“How do I do that?,” 

She pauses, looking thoughtful as dessert gets brought to the table. Kageyama smiles at the little twinkle in her eyes as she looks down and then back at him. 

“Well ease it into as best you can, try to make it seem natural. Be honest, but not too honest you know?,” 

He shakes his head. 

“Way too confusing,” 

She hums before a light-bulb goes off in her head. 

“Try it on me! Pretend like you wanna get to know me - ask about what I like to do for fun maybe. Feel out my answers and try to get to know more. I’ll give you a rating out of ten!,” she puts her thumb up at Kageyama. All he can think is that he doesn’t have to pretend. 

Kageyama puts on his game face, taking a deep breath before putting on his “I’m being forced to interact with others,” voice with a dash of sincerity and looks at her. He’s almost perfected the craft of being like this. He softens all of his defined and nearly aggressive features, relaxing his shoulders and sitting up straight. It’s entirely subdued - he still looks like a regular, deadpan Kageyama but with more.. finesse maybe. 

“I hope you’ve had a good evening so far, Yachi-san,” Kageyama bows mildly at her and Yachi’s jaws drop. He definitely doesn’t need her help. 

“I wanted to ask what you do for fun, outside of work,” 

His expression is a little glassy, transparent. Yachi wonders where he learned to be so impressive, considering the possibility of media-training but deciding to go along with it anyhow. She can’t help but giggle at the proud expression that lingers in his mostly plain face. 

“Well, Kageyama-san - I like to paint in my free time. I also like to cook and sew,” 

“What kind of things do you like to paint?,” He asks, sounding curious. 

Yachi can’t contain her gasp. He’s doing way too well - it almost bothers her. Kageyama looks at her with curiosity, like a preschool kid asking for his teacher's approval. It’s barely visible to anyone else, but it’s clear to Yachi. She smiles, reaching over the table to miss his hair a bit, not enough to ruin the styling. 

“I like painting the night sky and flowers. I think they’re quite nice,” Yachi says with a soft hum. Kageyama nods his head, expression unreadable. 

“I’d love to see them someday,” he replies “I bet they’re beautiful,” 

“You didn’t really need my help did you, Tobio?,” 

He shakes his head, reverting to his comfortable expression as he takes a sip of water. He pauses, unsure of how to proceed before he thinks of something to say. 

“It’s just easy with you,” he murmurs. 

It’s soundless in the palace of her mind. Her mouth is dry, the kind of dry it gets when she’s sick and can’t breathe through her nose. It feels like they’re both dancing around the same thing, wordlessly swaying to the nothingness. It frustrates her. Why is it so much harder to hide how you feel than to just put it out there? And why is she so inclined to just say it? 

She  _ can’t _ . She repeats that to herself in her head. Kageyama and Hinata love each other in that way, not her. She should be happy with her friends being so happy in such a good relationship. She should feel lucky that they’re still friends.

She shouldn’t place so much meaning on the little details because she never had a place in that anyways. She shouldn’t wonder if maybe there’s something to read in too. If there was more to his memorization of her life, or his shortened but thoughtful sentences. She shouldn’t wonder if he picks out the best words just for her. 

But, she can’t seem to let it go either. She stares at her hands, the color painted on her long nails - clicking them together. 

“What do you mean?,” she inquires, begging her voice to have more confidence. It hushes for a moment too long before Kageyama speaks up - looking in her hazel eyes to steady himself to the words.

“It’s easy to be with you,” he falters “And to… ask about you and your life,” 

“Why?,” 

“It’s you,” he states confidently “Does there need to be another reason?,” 

Yachi stares at Kageyama who seems to be looking anywhere but her. When they meet eyes again, hers are crinkled in the corner, full of adoration. She knows exactly what he means, because she knows there’s nothing anyone could say that would ever be more true than that. A quiet signal of Kageyama's love that she’s learned so well. 

It’s a reminder, tonight. Of a lot of things. 

She’s chronicled her many dates in her mind in order of which ones teach her the most. Leave it to Kageyama and Hinata to chart the top of her list without lifting a finger. It makes her laugh to know just how deep it all runs, love the sinks into the deepest parts of her. Yachi can barely untangle the cords that make  _ her _ up, so who does she think she is to think she’d be able to untangle her feelings for her best friends?

It’s awful, mostly. It’s messy, and makes her feel like she’s falling apart at the seams. Her eyes rake over Kageyama whose quietly eating a slice of cake and paying attention to nothing, and she feels her heartbeat speed. It beats against her ribs like it’s begging to be let out, trying to pump blood fast enough. Trying to survive the whirlwind of adrenaline that just being in his presence gives. 

The mess isn’t in the feelings, but in the trivial facts. How Yachi knows so much about Kageyama and his habits. How she knows the same of Hinata. 

She knows that Kageyama likes the smell of her detergent since it’s sweet. She knows that Hinata likes when she does his hair with clips and bands. She knows that Hinata likes the warmth but Kageyama prefers the cold. She knows that Natsu tells Kageyama news before she tells Hinata. 

She knows they can’t hold their liquor, and what clothes they wear to bed, and how it’s always Hinata who drives. It's Kageyama who does the laundry when they come home. He’s also the one who sleeps in, much to everyone's surprise. 

What heavy feelings reside in her. No one can be full and empty at once, that’s what she was told. Something that only makes sense. 

Regardless of that fact, she’s here. Regardless of these details, Yachi is sitting in front of one of the people she cherishes most in the world and is being flooded by the reality. It guts her, yet she feels relieved. Kageyama cuts into his cake with an experienced hand. It looks comically big in comparison to the dainty cutlery that the restaurant provides. She stares at them for a while, before cutting into her own dessert. 

“Do you wanna go somewhere after this?,” 

Yachi is startled by the sound of his voice, her eyes flashing up to Tobio who is shyly looking around. Her first question isn’t why. 

“Where?,” 

“I wanna take you to the beach,” 

“For the date?,” 

He shakes his head. 

“For you,” He clarifies “I wanna be with you a little longer,” 

Yachi chokes but nods anyways. She stares at Kageyama who looks so nervous like he’s gonna throw up and she can’t help but feel her heart clench in her chest. She nods, unsure of what the best course of action is but she wants this. 

“I wanna be with you too, Tobio,” Yachi chokes out “Just a little longer,” 

He smiles at that. Soft and genuine. She isn’t sure how much more she can take of all this but she feels it’d be foolish to decline because she really did wanna stay with him a little longer. 

_

She falls asleep on the drive to the beach, only waking up to hear Kageyama telling his boyfriend that he’ll be home late. She misses the rest of the call, hearing incoherent bits and pieces of conversation that fall away as she leans her hands against the window and lets the night pass her slowly. 

Kageyama's voice is familiar as he wakes her up. She blinks sleepily, her eyes feeling sticky as she does. Kageyama gives her a small smile. She sits up, pressing her knuckles underneath her eye and trying not to ruin her makeup before asking a question in her delirium. 

“Are we here?,” she mumbles. Kageyama nods. 

“Yeah, one sec,” 

He closes the car door and steps out before opening up Yachis door. She’s startled, watching him kneel down. She shifts her body to face him, unbuckling her seatbelt and ready to ask what he’s doing. Before she can though, a gentle hand is holding her calf, shifting her foot. She watches with her mouth agape as he unbuckles the belt of her heels and slides the first one off. He places it standing on the concrete before taking her left leg and repeating the same action. She doesn’t realize she’s holding a breath until she watches him stand up, offering his hand out to her. 

“I c-could’ve taken them off myself,” she breathes. Kageyama just shrugs, helping her onto the cold concrete. Kageyama places her heels in the car before crouching down to roll his pants up and take off his dress shoes. It’s unusual to see him like that. Opening up his backseat, he puts his shoes up along with her bag. Shifting her focus, her eyes find the moon and ocean and she smiles. She’s always loved the beach, feeling compelled by the sudden adventure. 

Kageyama is too far out of her peripherals for her to see his gaze. It's settled on the outline of her silhouette in the moonlight. Strands of wispy blonde that she tucks behind her ear, the soft curl of her mouth, the way she curls her toes against the concrete. She exists in her own space, in her own world - sometimes it feels very far for him. He wants to reach out to it but his hand retracts each time he gets close. Today feels lucky, like triple 7’s. Kageyama just wants to cherish it. 

He just wants to cherish Yachi like he does Hinata. He wants to see Hinata cherish the same way because Yachi deserves to be cherished. She  _ gets _ him. It’s not like Hinata. Hinata’s understanding of Kageyama took much more time and patience. It was with many more trials and errors. Sometimes it’s still hard for them to make things click to each other but they never go to bed without trying to make sense of each other first. That’s how they work and Kageyama loves how they work. 

Yachi is different. He never has to explain his trains of thought in clumsy ways to her. When she’s there between the two of them. she mediates. She knows better than anyone how to find common ground and she forces them to find it too. She knows what Kageyama is trying to say even before he does. 

He hears that Hinata is the sun while he is the moon often. He understands it - but between them, Yachi is the stars. Always there, if not always visible. She is not a backdrop to the two of the, but instead she highlights the best of them. She is her own body of celestial beauty, one that expands across galaxies with no limits. She is free and never to be claimed. That’s just how Yachi is. 

But, if Kageyama had a chance to claim the stars, he’d empty his bank account to finish the endeavor. He just can’t help it. 

He sighs, shutting the car door before peering over to Yachi. 

“Let’s go,” he offers a hand out to her and without hesitation, she takes it. Yachis hands are dainty, in comparison to Hinatas. He’s held it before, to walk her across the street or make sure she’s safe but this feels different to him. Her fingers are more slim, hand much smaller in comparison to his. Her nails are manicured and sit against his skin when they lock hands. 

“Yeah,” she wonders how long they’ll stay like that, subconsciously holding his hand a little tighter “Let’s go,” 

_

Yachi has forgotten just how much she loves the beach. 

It’s lovely, even so late at night. She knows it’s cliche to like it so much, but there is something about. It’s not exactly the sand between her toes, or the moonlight. Nor is it the sound of crashing waves and water - though all of these things were beloved in their own right. 

It’s the stillness in every detail. The static existence of the sand amongst the floor and the crashing waves. It’s all steady, easing Yachi’s normally sensitive nerves. 

They’re still holding hands. Kageyama's hands are surprisingly well-kept; Yachi is excited by that. She isn’t as worried as she thought she’d be, and it’s all incredibly relieving. It feels bittersweet to watch the freeness of the ocean, the way the waves are steady up until the point they hit the ground. She understands that too, in its own right. 

“This is nice,” Yachi says mindlessly. Kageyama hums in agreement, not really focusing on what she’s saying. He can’t, even if he tries too. His body is hyper aware of the contact between the two of them. 

“Why’d you wanna take me out here again?,” 

He catches the question just barely. Thoughtlessly, he brushes his thumb against the back of her hand as they stand and watch the sea. It’s too much for Kageyama but he manages to anchor himself in her steadiness. 

“You like the beach,” he says quietly “I wanted to take you somewhere you liked before you had to go home. I wanted you to have fun,” 

In a moment of lost inhibitions, she smiles. It feels romantic, and to her, twisted. 

“No matter what we do, Tobio - I’ll like being around you,” 

With a bated breath, Kageyama finds himself squeezing her hand a little tighter. 

“Really? I know it’s different when Sho isn’t around,” 

She shakes her head, staring at the floor. She watches the sand slip between her toes, sensing the irony. 

“It’s best when we’re all together,” she starts “At least to me. I don’t know about you and Hinata,” 

She stops to look over at Tobio, observing his features. The bridge of his nose, the angle of his constantly clenched jaw, the round curve of his lips. Sincerely handsome, and not scowling like you might suspect. She can’t help the euphoria that washes over her. Just for today, she promises again. 

“But I like you by yourself and I like Hinata the same. Still, it’s best when we’re all together to me, but this is good too,” she assures. 

He’s quick to follow her. 

“It’s best to us too,” Kageyama hints “It’s best to us when we’re all together,” 

Yachi doesn’t catch it, much to Kageyama's dismay. She’s long since sold herself on the idea that could be a reality. But the thought is enough to make her happy all over again. The gap between the two of them is almost completely closed. They’re close, too close maybe. She rests her head on his shoulder and Kageyama swallows. Oh, how nice it feels to be close to her like this. He’s sure Hinata would be jealous that he got to be. 

“I’m really glad,” she whispers to the open sea. 

There is a secret in each syllable. She finds contentment in that too. 

__ 

Reality is a heavy place. 

In the week that follows her date with Tobio, little changes. That was what she expected, because with the three of them, nothing ever really changes. It still disappoints her to some degree, though she doesn’t know for certain which facet of this knowledge is the most hurtful. If she had to guess, it was the fact it was Yachi alone in this woe. They weren’t feeling this, or thinking this, or seeing this how Yachi was. They might not have been seeing this at all, and that depresses her. 

The date was on Saturday. On Sunday, she cried the entire day and made fruit-tarts with Yamaguchi. On Monday, she got over it for the 100th time - burying the violent conflict in her heart and trading it for gratitude that she still gets to be important to them. She’s an adult now, even though she doesn’t feel like one. She shouldn’t feel this conflicted over a matter so simple - and because of that, she works up the nerve to text Kageyama. The date he was supposed to go out on was taking place a while later - but she thought a text would quell her nerves. To her surprise, she was right. It helps to see his short, curt reply. She also manages to text in the groupchat. Funny story, Kageyama and Hinata normally text in the groupchat instead of texting one-on-one. She’d always found that odd. 

On Wednesday, she decides she’ll confess to them both. She isn’t exactly which one of her thoughts triggered this decision, but it wasn’t one made in haste. It was the opposite, strangely enough. She’s sure by the time she tells them, her anxiety would be swallowing her up. She’s sure she’ll agonize over it - but it was something she spent all week thinking of. If she really wanted to be their friends after all this, she needs to move on as best she can. She needs to try to put it all behind her once and for all. 

She’s thought of every damn possibility. Not once or twice - but one thousand times over. She’s considered the worst realities so many times, but nothing is worth this painful feeling of longing. With time, once she’s over it, she can go back to being their best friend in a proper way. 

Most of all, Yachi knows that she can’t keep doing this. Not forever. For herself - she just has to tell them and move right on. She’ll deal with the aftermath later. 

Thursday passes, and she tells Yamaguchi who gives her a tight hug and tells her he’ll do everything he can. She smiles at her best friend with fondness that day, and the rest of the day isn’t so bad. It’s normal for her, anyways. On Thursday night, she packs up everything she needs for her trip this weekend. She plans everything out according to plan. 

She’ll spend the weekend with Hinata and make it home on Sunday - but instead of going home she’ll drop by their apartment. She’ll explain herself and just let it all out, and then she’ll take an Uber home. She doesn’t have any important classes on Monday so she’ll skip to get over the initial shock and then she’ll move on. She knows it’s gonna fucking suck, but she’s already set in stone that this is what’ll happen. She opens her heart and accepts it. 

She’ll accept this one last day with Hinata, since she got hers with Kageyama. She’ll let herself cherish today so much it stings. It

The reality weighs her shoulders down when she walks down the stairs with Shoyo who seems to insist on taking her bags. She forces herself not to dwell on it, sighing as Shoyo packs up the last of the bags into the taxi. He pats the trunk, startling her out of her daze before giving her a toothy grin. He looks handsome today - casual but dressed up enough to impress his family. Yachi told him to dress nice but couldn’t suspect he really would. 

He bows, opening the door for her with a smile that she returns with a small laugh. 

“Thanks, Sho,” Yachi hums politely. Hinata shakes his head. 

“No need for thanks, Yacchan! Gotta give my fiancee the absolute best treatment, right?,” Hinata grins. Yachis eyes widen, before falling into her lap. She feels completely dazed by the sentiment but ends up nodding along dumbly. 

“Of course,” she replies panicked. Hinata giggles to himself before shutting the door and scooting in beside her. 

“Where to?,” the driver asks with a soft smile. She watches as he gives the word but the words don’t have meaning in her ears. It’s all static as the car starts and drives them towards what she assumes is the train station. 

_

It’s so goddamn hectic. Yachi expected as much, but it’s forcing her to cling to Hinata's side in an unusually affectionate way - and it wasn’t helping her heart (or body) at all. Hinata has absolutely 0 reason to be this beefed up. She was going to combust if she continued like this, and she finds herself wondering how Kageyama deals with this. 

She shuffles her feet, following Hinata’s lead as they make their way to the train. It spreads out thinner from there, the crowd less packed as they make their way onto their specific one. Hinata doesn’t ask her to let go, so she doesn’t end up doing it. The whole time they make their way, Yachi is holding gently to his forearm, feeling dwarfed by just how much he’s sized up. She wonders if there’s something in the water overseas but shakes it off as they make their way to the doors. 

She lets go of Hinata as they narrowly slide through the doors down to their seats. Opening their booth, Hinata slides in all of their luggage before shutting the doors closed and grinning at her ear-to-ear. Immediately, he opens the curtains and gets a view of all the people watching the train before departure. He sits across from her, crossing her arms on the table that puts distance between the two of them. 

He grins at her in very typical Shoyoufashion and she finds herself smiling back. At first awkward, before breaking out into a fit of giggles. Hinata looks as if he’s won the jackpot. 

“What, Sho?,” she asks through a series of laughs. Hinata shakes his head.

“Mmm, nothing. Just excited for my family to meet my fiance,” 

Yachi slaps his forehead at that, before flicking his forehead lightly. 

“People are gonna get the wrong idea, Sho,” 

Hinata almost looks offending, sitting up and placing a hand over his heart. He’s pouting at her, lips downturned. If she didn’t know this look well, she might really worry he was upset. She can only roll her eyes. 

“Not the wrong idea, Yacchan! This weekend, you are my fiancee and we must play the part! Method acting!,” Hinata insists. Yachi can’t help but feel light, shaking her head but not giving up quite yet. 

“And what about Tobio?,” 

“Who?,”

“Shoyou!,” 

Instead of responding, Hinata reaches a hand out and connects it with hers. He places his elbows on the table, now opting to hold them both before gaining a faux serious expression. 

“We have to play the part, Yacchan!! It’s vital. We should probably start now so it’s not awkward when we get to my house,” Hinata insists. Yachi hums. That does technically make sense, and since Hinata was paying her to be his date - it’s fine. It might hurt Yachi in the long run, but it’s not like she isn’t gonna be hurt anyways. Hinata was making the best out of the situation, she’s sure. She doesn’t think too much of it. 

She plays pretend, drawing her eyebrows together with a small hum before nodding bright, squeezing Hinata’s hands with a small laugh. 

“Got it,” Yachi says “From now on, we’ll play the part,” she agrees. Hinata flushes a little, his neck feeling hot. He knows he’s the one who suggested it, but it embarasses him nonetheless. Yachi is beautiful in the sunlight, it highlights the vibrant golds amongst dirty blondes. She’s wearing lip gloss that’s sticky and pink and shutting her eyes as the light pours through. 

Hinata is not very good with words, never has been in even if they’re just in his head. But, she makes his heart go  _ woosh _ and that means a lot more than he can understand. 

“How should we play the part, though, Sho?,” 

Hinata, broken out of his trance, frowns at that. He didn’t think that far, but something pops in his brain. He stands up, turning the corner of the table before sliding into the seat next to her. He leans his elbows on the table, looking at her with a toothy smile. 

“I think I’ve got it,” 

Yachi mirrors him, smiling back. 

“Yeah,” she says with a breathy laugh “I think so too,” 

__ 

The rest of train-ride goes without a hitch. Yachi ends up falling asleep on Hinata’s side and wakes up when he blows on her lashes and watches her crinkle her nose. 

Thereafter, they take another cab to the home of Hinata’s aunt. Hinata gives her a rundown of what to expect, but Yachi knows about most of it. He has a niece and nephew from his favorite cousin who are most excited to see her. He has two cousins he’s really close too, and an aunt who always smells like old-linen. He warns her about these minor details, but Yachi has already committed those facts to her memory for the first time she was over. 

“My niece and nephew,” he starts with a laugh “They’re pretty clever so they’re gonna ask me to kiss you in front of them probably. They did it when Tobio was over, so,” he trails off, scratching the back of his neck. Yachi widens her eyes but laughs lightheartedly. 

“Like on the lips,” 

Hinata cringes as she explains but she only laughs harder, shaking her head and patting his shoulder. 

“It’s okay. As long as Tobio won’t be mad, do what you have too. Kids can be tough to convince,” Yachi assures. Hinata gives a relieved sigh at that, drooping his shoulders. Kageyama might be mad, but for different reasons than what Yachi may think. 

“Thanks for being so understanding, Yacchan,” Hinata says, already exhausted. Yachi only shakes her head, watching as they pull into the driveway of the house with a small laugh. 

Hinata thanks the driver as Yachi collects herself, preparing to enter the house. She stretches her stiff shoulder out, waiting for Hinata who quickly comes to open her door. How gentlemanly, she thinks. 

“You ready?,” 

She feels a mild level of anxiety, but still is ultimately level. With a softened brow, she manages to unclench her jaw and nod. 

“As ready as I can be,” 

__ 

Yachi has never been fawned over this much in her whole life. 

The attention really isn’t bad at all. It’s not exactly welcome though either, mostly just unexpected. As soon as they walked in, though they were mostly well-aware that Yachi wasn’t Hinata’s actual significant other, they still gawked and gasped over her. Even more so than Kageyama, which surprises her because… you know… 

Kageyama is a beautiful, adonis, pro-athlete and she is but a poor college student and graphic designer. She’s never considered herself ugly outright, but never someone to be awed at either. It was just… a lot to process - especially seeing as Hinata was being forced to interact with the men of the family and discuss whatever they discussed. Sports, Yachi imagines. 

“It’s a shame, really - the Shoyou isn’t marrying you,” one of Hinata's aunts comments. Yachi blushes, bowing her head with a thanks - unsure of what to say. She feels like it’s nor really her place to speak despite the fact that she was the one they were talking about. She just listens as they murmur in agreements, responding politely to each and every question and compliment. Yachi is confident in this ability at least, having grown very accustomed to appeasing family members in her line of work. It was a smidge harder, because it was Hinata's family and she has a desire to genuinely impress them. Still though, the basic outline of what she had to do was the same. 

All conversation was cut short however by a knock at the door, and a bunch of excitable greetings. She can hear an old, feeble voice from the otherside of the wall and it clicks. The person that they were supposed to be meeting with in the first place, Shoyou’s great-grandma

Before she can think, Hinata pokes his head through the doorway, searching for Yachi. He smiles when his eyes land on her, reaching out a hand for her. He ignores the look from all his aunts, smiling when Yachi takes it and pulls her quickly out of the room, shutting the door after telling everyone that they’d be back. 

Hinata stands in front of Yachi with a nervous expression, both hands placed on her shoulders seriously. He doesn’t have to speak, Yachi quietly removes the hands from her shoulders and holds one before nodding. 

“Let’s go,” she says simply, walking through the living room threshold. Hinata is grateful that Yachi is worlds more confident than he is, or at least seems to be. 

They walk into the living room with relative ease. All is quiet, other than the two of the approaching Hinata great grandmother. Yachi immediately takes on her role of girlfriend and future wife with almost detrimental amounts of ease. She first drops his head, before getting on her knees and bowing again. 

“It’s an honor to meet you, ma’am,” 

Hinata swallows thickly upon seeing it go down, watching his great-grandmother. To his extreme surprise, she looks over and smiles down at Yachi - patting her shoulders and telling her to stand with an earnest smile. 

“I’m Shoyou’s fiance, Yachi Hitoka,” she says bowing again. There’s an unmistakable beat of silence. He waits patiently, quietly. As much as he didn’t care for his great-grandmother, it was still important that everything went smoothly today. It was a matter of respect, more than likeability. His great-grandmother grins, her eyes crinkled in the corner. 

She stares at Yachi, with a heavy sigh. 

“You’re very pretty, Yacchan,” she says, using her shaky hand to hold Yachi’s, pulling her down and urging her to sit. 

“Please, come sit,” 

__ 

Hinata had always admired her.

Always. Since the day she entered the clubroom when they were in high school, with her fidgeting hands and unstable gaze. Maybe especially then, had Hinata admired her in all that she was. It’s just  _ occurring _ to him now more than ever. It does leave him feeling strangely uneasy. His mixed emotions that he masks so well. His untempered adoration for the girl in front of him - or more like a woman. Yachi, but fully imagined and comfortable in her skin.

Hinata had always admired her, but the depth of those thoughts show themselves now. As he watches her interact with his family so effortlessly. Not butting heads, but not being pushed over or stepped on either. Just being present, and lively, and seemingly effortlessly. Hinata wishes he could read minds, or better - wishes he could express how much Yachi fascinates him. 

The weekend still had two days, and a night left before it was over. Yachi had become well acquainted with the family in the blink of an eye. She answered each question from his great grandmother with an almost eerie amount of grace. She answered how they met, when they started dating and how, and why she loves Hinata. Each time, even when she lied, she sounded so real. Like every single word from her mouth was a retelling as opposed to a white lie. 

She’d conversed with her, and all of his uncles and cousins, and nieces and nephews. Each time she was pulled in a different direction, giving Hinata an apologetic smile, she would brighten up the room. It looked and sounded completely flawless, and in a way - he doesn’t know if he recognized it completely. He had always known Yachi had grown up, but he couldn’t predict it’d be this much

It had been like that for most of the long day. Each time, she would be pulled to speak with some random family member and the two of them barely had any time to talk to each other. He knew that would be part of it, but it didn’t bother him any less. 

By now, it was late into the evening. The kids had all fallen asleep, and the adults were having drinks. Hinata's nephew was asleep in Yachis lap when he handed her a can of beer with a look of apology. His nephew was clinging to her side but Yachi didn’t seem to mind. 

“Sheesh, I know my family can be a lot but today was,” he trails off, trying to find the words. Yachi giggles quietly. 

“I’m tired but it wasn’t so bad,” she assures. Hinata isn’t convinced but lets it go. He quietly takes her can, opening the beer and moving it so that it wouldn’t wake up the sleeping child before holding the can up to Yachis mouth. 

He gives her a lopsided smile, watching her take a sip proudly. He suppresses the strong desire to kiss her, wondering if she might taste like beer. 

“Oh, that was good,” she says, feeling warmth pour through her. Hinata gives her another sip before placing the can down next to him. 

“Shoyou, you and Yacchan are staying over tonight right?,” 

Hinata looks over to his aunt and gives her a curt nod.

“Okay, your room is upstairs on the left. Same one you left your luggage. Drop Yukio off on the couch and go rest up,” she says, referring to his nephew. Yachi gently stands, placing the small boy on the couch with a tiny smile, brushing his hair back and giving him a kiss on the temple. She’d grown very attached to him in the short time. 

“He’s so cute,” Yachi whispers to Shoyo. He smiles at her, nodding mindlessly. 

“We should head upstairs,” Hinata comments, watching Yachi yawn - arms stretching over her head with a small frown etched on her features. She carefully rubs her eyes so as to not rub her makeup off completely, nodding. 

“Mhm,” she mumbles “Lets go,”

__ 

They’ve had countless sleepovers with the three of them together, or the five of them if Yamaguchi and Tsukishima decide to show up. Hinata has seen Yachi in sleepwear more than once in her life, even in shorts and a tank-top. It shouldn’t fluster him after all this time. 

But it does. He’s pretending to be on his phone as she watches her standing in front of the mirror, putting on her skincare routine. Her shirt is big, the sleeves are meant to be short but reach her elbow. She’s wearing shorts but you can’t tell all the way, covered mostly by the fabric of her shorts. Hinata isn’t that type of person, but it’s distracting nonetheless. Only because it’s her and he has plenty of pent-up feelings about her anyways. 

Plus she’s cute, especially cute leaned over the edge of the dressing table, getting extra close to take off the makeup underneath her eyes with micellar water. Or at least, he thinks it’s micellar water - that’s what she called it last time. She huffs, adjusting the soft pink hair band that kept her hair clipped back before tossing the cotton-pad in the trash. 

Maybe it’s especially overwhelming for both of them because they were sharing a bed. They’ve done it before, but normally Kageyama is also there. This feels too intimate for either of them to rest easy, yet neither of them suggest sleeping on the floor. 

But, Yachi is done with her regular night routine, and she crawls into bed next to Hinata who clicks his phone off and gives her a goofy smile. There’s enough of a gap between the two of them for it to feel worlds away even if it isn’t. She gives Hinata a tired smile, resisting the overwhelming desire to brush the hairs away from his handsome, sun-kissed face. 

“How was today?,” he murmurs, reaching around to turn the lights dim. Not entirely off, Yachi and Kageyama both prefer dim lights. Yachi yawns remember the events of today, before giggling. 

“Tiring, but fun I think,” she replies “Yukio is such a treasure, you know,” she recalls with a soft laugh. Hinata hums, encouraging her to elaborate. She reaches for a stray strand of fabric on the edge of the pillowcase, fiddling with it.

“We played Knight and Princess,” she retells “He was a brave, handsome knight and he saved me from a big dragon who was keeping me in the tower. Right after, he asked me to marry him so he could always keep me safe,” 

“Even though I’m supposed to be your fiance?,” Hinata inquired, immediately offended. Yachi finds herself falling into giggles again, nodding. 

“I said the same thing but he was very determined to steal me from you. So cute,” Yachi clutches her chest. Hinata manages a pout at that. 

“After that, he spent the rest of the day telling me ghost stories till he fell asleep. He has a great imagination, even for a kid,” Yachi pouts half-way through 

“He’s a sweetheart and a good kid. Very polite. Your niece asked me to do her hair and he helped with that too,” 

“I’m glad they didn’t bother you too much,” 

Yachi shakes her head, yawning. 

“They’re good kids, just a little excitable. Kinda reminds me of someone,”

Hinata lets out a fake gasp and makes her laugh all over again. He ignores the way his heart swells at the sound. It beats violently, with reckless abandon against his ribcage. When it settles again, he asks more questions. 

“Yukio’s obsessed with ghosts and stuff,” Hinata mumbles, blinking softly. The two of them have been staring at each other for what feels like hours but neither of them move away. 

“I could tell,” 

It’s quiet again. 

“Do you believe in ghosts, Yacchan?,” 

Yachi nods. 

“I believe in most like.. supernatural-ish things to a degree. And in aliens, but we’ve talked about that before,” Yacih recounts. Hinata pauses, furrowing his brow. 

Yachi has always been a faithful person. She’s always had a romantic view of the universe, even if her view of herself and her life is so ordinary. He knows Yachis views on most things that exist in the context of the universe and it’s vastness. She isn't exactly religious but she does believe somethings out there looking out for her. She believes in aliens too. She has a tendency to put her faith especially in things she can’t see. He uses all of these as reasons to tell himself it's okay if he asks this question. 

“Do you believe in stuff like soulmates, Yacchan?, 

It’s especially quiet then. It’s dark, but Yachi’s eyes have adjusted to the light enough to see the outline of his face. She can see the rings in the curls of his hair, the bump of his cheeks, the sharp quality of his lips and hairline. He is unkempt in the darkness, but still vibrant - but she is almost completely unable to read his expression. She says, to herself, and in her mind - that it’s an innocent question but it tugs on her sanity. She can’t express how much it makes her squirm, rubbing her feet together anxiously. 

She should answer. Before it gets suspicious, she thinks to herself. 

“Sorta,” she sighs

“Sorta?,” 

She shifts her arm under the pillow, feeling exposed as she nods. 

“I don’t think there’s one kind of soulmate or that there is only one soulmate for a person,” 

She doesn’t add the “Because I can’t,” to the end of the sentence. It takes all of her will. 

“I think,” she swallows the lump in her throat and proceeds

“I think everyone has a different kind or set of soulmates that’s set to fit their needs. If someone is yours from the universe, it would only make sense that you’re adjusted to each other's life, right? I think even your dog or cat could be your soulmate,” she explains. Hinata just stares at. It’s taking a fight he’s unsure he has in him to stop himself from kissing her. Or hugging her.

All he wants, in that moment, is to be as close to her as possible. 

“It all depends on each person. So, I think there are soulmates but it’s not so strict, maybe,” Yachi explains. 

“What about you, Hitoka?,

She’s startled by the use of her first name. She closes her eyes, staring into the darkness before images pop-up blurrily in her vision. She’s seeing a timeline - an empty classroom after sunrise, a volleyball net tucked into a storage room, a referee at an official match, cheering fans, and the comedown from the high. She’s seeing everything in its entirety. Every valentines day where they give her a gift just so she isn’t left out. Every white day where she gives them both one back. It’s not rose-colored, nor is it navy blue. It feels like lavender, leaving her with an unshakeable longing to continue closing her eyes. It’s a middle ground between melancholy and joy. 

She opens her eyes, and smiles. She wonders if he can tell how watery they are. 

“I know I have more than one,” she laughs “I don’t know if they think the same,” 

Yachi doesn’t dare ask the question back. She doesn’t dare ask him how he feels. She doesn’t want to know the answer to that question, or more like - she believes she does.

It’s hard to say who is struggling more than. Because Hinata wishes she asked and Yachi wishes he didn’t. It is all so terribly complicated, yet so terribly simply. 

“They’d be stupid not too,” Hinata says, swallowing the green demons that demand to be let out. 

Yachi lets out a humorless laugh, shutting her eyes again. 

“I’d like to think so too,” 

___

She feels at ease. 

Isn’t that odd? 

She thinks so too. This whole time, she had believed that after her date with Hinatas she would be dreading the time that would follow. At the very least, she thought she’d be nursing her own sadness for a long while, and not feel even the littlest bit okay about the situation. 

It’s not the case at all, actually. It’s Sunday night now, and they are taking a cab to Hinata’s apartment who had no issue with bringing her to the apartment after the trip. The rest of the weekend went by without a hitch. Hinata’s great grandmother gave them her blessing before they left, so the trip was a success. She had fun with him and his family, and now they were on their way home 

But Yachi, surprising even herself, went through with her initial plan. She asks Hinata if she could drop by his place, to talk to them both about something, and Hinata agrees easily. She isn’t lying, but they probably assume she means about payment. She figures they’d both venmo her money no matter what she says about it, but it isn’t about that at all. She’s just thinking, maybe living, in the landscape of her own mind. She thought she would feel more anxious, more frightened - because isn’t dropping news like this so frightening? Shouldn’t she be shaking in her boots at the thought? 

It doesn’t occur to her right away that she has spent wellover 9 years living over the five stages of grief because of this, so much that she’s already reached the final one. Maybe she had spent her whole life mourning this inevitable loss, and now acceptance feels like the easiest part. That’s what Yachi was after all - the mediator. 

She had spent her whole life tucking the ragged and broken edges of herself in order to save everyone the trouble. It makes sense that she did it for this too. She’s changed a lot in her life, but some things never do. 

She laughs. It’s not empty. Not sad or happy. Just there, soft and whimsical. It’ll hit her later that she’d gone through and done it, but she was as ready as she could ever be. 

“We’re here, Yacchan,” Hinata’s voice calls out distantly.

She blinks, and laughs again. 

“I’m coming, one sec,” 

__ 

The elevator up to their condo is quiet other than casual chatter. Yachi feels both very far-away and extremely hyper-aware. 

She’s trying to figure out the best way to word it in her head. It’s not exactly the most average love confession - she can’t just go and say “Hey! I’m in love with you!,” because it’s not just one person, it’s two. Two people who are her best friends and already love each other. It’ll be awkward at best, but it doesn’t really matter anyways.

It’ll likely be the last time she’ll enter this building for a few months, so she takes in all the details. Athletes money is truly and sincerely something else. Even the elevator has mirrors and nice gold colored decorum in it - it makes her scowl a little.

The elevator closes as they walk to the apartment door. The floor is made of marble it looks like, or something expensive of the sort. She can see her tiny reflection in it and Hinatas too. It makes her laugh a little, but she’s alerted by the sound of Hinata’s jingling keys. 

“Tobio! I’m home - and I brought Yacchan!,” Hinata calls out, nudging the door open with his shoulder. Much to her surprise, Tobio shows up at the door in his pajamas. He looks like he's half-asleep - probably waiting for Hinata to show up. She should hurry on with it so they can get their sleep. 

“Oh, Hitoka - what’re you doing here? Is Yamaguchi not home?,” 

“Yacchan said she wanted to talk to us about something,” Hinata says with a shrug. Yachi hums in agreement with Hinata’s statement, taking off her shoes and trading them for slippers. 

“It’ll be quick, I don’t wanna trouble you guys too much so I’ll take an Uber home,” 

“You never trouble us, Yacchan,” Hinata says with a pout. Kageyama nods in agreement and Yachi wants to bust up with laughter. She wants to tell them she’s about too but doesn’t. 

They all shuffle their way into the living room. It’s all starting to come through like she predicted it might. She wonders if she’ll be able to escape without crying, but she has heavy doubts. She’d always been prone to crying, but it can’t be helped. She’s here to let it out, so she shouldn’t save herself the trouble at the cost of her sincerity. 

The two of them sit on the couch while Yachi sits on the single sofa chair. 

Before she says anything, and before they do - she looks at them in person one last time. They’re bickering, but the noise doesn’t reach her. Hinata is scowling, with that signature look of offense etched into his features. Kageyama looks deadpan but he mirrors his expression, jaw hardened. She can see how much they love each other, and how even in this moment - she is just watching.

She burns the memory into her brain, unsure of if it will haunt her in her dreams or comfort her through the reality of the days that follow. She is all but sure. 

Uncertainty has always been her greatest enemy, but she has to face it some time. Why not now and why not here? There is no good reason to save face. 

She smiles again, swallowing the lump in her throat. She never did like making things easy on herself. 

“Sorry, Yacchan - what did you wanna talk to us about? Payment right?,” Hinata asks, calling her out of her head. She looks up at the both of them, her eyes growing teary but she suppresses, simply shaking her head. 

“Uh, no actually,” she says, easing her trembling nerves. She can’t look at either of them. 

“Before I say anything - can you both promise to let me just talk for a while?,” 

“Are you okay, Hitoka?,” Kageyama is first to ask. 

She doesn’t answer. She can’t.

“Please you guys?,” she says with another half-smile. 

“Okay, Yacchan - sure. What’s up?,”

For a moment, it’s all clear in her head. Everything is crystalline, but broken. The weight of reality is crushing and heavy in the palm of her hands - the cutting glass that injured her tired hands. For the first time in her whole life, she’s come to term with this truth in its entirety. This was the burden that comes with loving people fully, and wholly. 

She isn’t crushed by what to say, but by what she shouldn’t. She just opts to say everything. 

She chooses to let go. 

“I’m in love with the both of you,” 

Silence. She doesn’t lift her head to check their reaction - just goes to fill it before it crushes her. 

“I have been for a long time, I think since we were freshmen. At first - I didn’t understand it because you know, that’s not exactly normal. I don’t think it would’ve changed anything, but it really hit me when we were third-years,” she tells.

Her voice shakes with each word, like autumn leaves. Her resolve to push through crumbles piece by piece and falls into her lap but she forces herself to keep going. It all feels so heavy. 

“It was right before I was going to leave for university and I was so terrified we would never see each other again. You two were, and still are my best friends - it’s why I’m even telling you. I can’t keep being friends with you if it continues like this, and I hope you can understand,” it’s all spilling out of her. All this time she has reinforced the seams of her existence but now each one is bursting, one by one. She can’t contain all the feelings. 

All the solace, the pain, the heartache, the loneliness. All the joy, the adoration, the restlessness. All the melancholy. All the unadulterated happiness. All of it comes spilling, like a knocked over glass. 

She wants to look to them for comfort, but it is a luxury she can no longer afford. It aches in the heaviness of her chest. It burns and stings as it forces its way out. It feels like she’s deflating. 

“Yacchan -,” she hears Hinata's voice but she shakes her head. She doesn’t notice how choked out it is. 

“You promised, Sho,” 

She takes a heavy breath, hiccuping as tears spill down her face. She doesn’t know where they start or end. 

“I love you both so, so much. It’s not like I could ever choose, and it’s not like you two don’t already have each other. I get it, and I’m sorry - it’s so selfish and I should’ve gotten over it. I should’ve nipped in the bud when we’re in highschool but you two were the first people I’ve ever loved so much, and probably the last,” 

“Hitoka,” 

“And I know it’s stupid. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I didn’t do something sooner, but I thought maybe - if I told you two now, we could just be friends after I took some time to get over it. I know that’s not fair to you two, but you have each other so I thought it’d be okay. But I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” 

She’s sobbing. It rips through her like a crack of lightning in the storming and desolate ocean. She is, once again, all alone. Carrying this heavy and painful burden all alone. It hurts. It hurts so fucking much. Her heart is pumping blood trying to keep up with the lack of air in her lungs. She’s crumbling. She is entirely broken. 

A strong hand comes up and grabs her wrist. She is too weak to protest as it pulls her hand from her face. Her eyes are screwed tight. 

“Hitoka,” it’s Kageyama. His voice is soothing. She lets out a weak whimper. She feels another presence next to his, a calloused hand on her knee. They’re both kneeling in front of her. 

“Have you said everything you need to say?,” Kageyama asks. 

She just nods.

“We love you too, Yacchan,” Hinata’s tells her, his voice raspy “Open your eyes please,” 

She doesn’t want to - 

Wait. 

What? 

“W-what did you just say?,” 

“We love you too, Hitoka,” Kageyama murmurs “We love you too. Always have,” 

She opens her eyes. Maybe she’s in some sort of sick dream, had she fallen asleep in the car. She wipes her stray tears and looks. 

They’re both staring at her intently. Hinata is crying, or at least his eyes are red and Kageyama can’t meet her gaze fully. Yachi reaches her hand out, brushing her thumb against Hinata’s face and swiping his tears. 

“This is a mean dream,” she whispers. 

“It’s not a dream, you idiot,” Hinata whispers, taking her hand and leaning into her palm. Yachi hiccups, shaking her head. No way. Not a fat fucking chance. 

“Hitoka,” Kageyama's voice trembles. She’s never heard it like that before. She stares at him, and the level of sincerity plastered all over his face makes her stomach flip 

“We really, really love you,” he whispers. 

This was, she realizes, the one reality she hadn’t given a second thought too. 

“No way,” she shakes her head, laughing “There’s no way,” 

“Hitoka,” Kageyama mumbles. He looks first at Hinata, who pouts but nods and gives his permission. He scoots to be directly in her line of vision, looking at her tear-stained faced with a frown. Easily, he takes her face and cradles it in his hands - wiping the tears from her eyes. 

“Please don’t cry and be sad anymore,” is all he manages to say. Yachi is dumbfounded, mouth agape and heart absolutely racing but for completely different reasons this time. She wants to laugh, because it honestly feels ridiculous. She feels, marginally, out of her mind. But - there’s Kageyama in front of her and her heart is soaring. She literally cannot believe it. 

“Can I kiss you, Tobio?,”

Hinata grunts. 

“You can only kiss him if I’m next,” 

Her eyes darted over to Hinata. She laughs, her body exhausted from the whirlwind of emotions. She hasn’t attempted to process the words that they just said, instead she is acting purely on instinct 

“You c-can k-kiss me,” Tobio nods. Yachi giggles at his embarrassment and seriousness, before nodding and whispering a thank you. He gets on his knees to be face level with her, but still manages to be much bigger than her in the end 

Kageyama drops his hands, letting Yachi take the lead. She’s only kissed a few people in her life, mostly Yamaguchi when they get drunk and touchy. This is different entirely. 

She leans forward, pressing her lips to Kageyamas after wiping her face of all her tears. Slowly, she parts her lips and takes it a little deeper - making a noise of surprise as Kageyama suddenly takes the lead again. He places a hand on the side of her face, drawing her as close as she can be before pulling away with a small breath. Kageyama kisses almost like how she expects, it’s sturdy and hard but still manages to feel intimate. Much like him. 

It’s just a kiss but it says everything. Everything she can’t. 

He bumps her forehead on hers, sighing. 

“Thank you,” Yachi whispers, never breaking eye contact with him. He just nods, closing his own in embarrassment. 

“You got your turn - now move so I can kiss her, damn it,” Hinata whines. Kageyama's face immediately turns into a scowl, scoffing at Hinata who ushers him to move over. When he gets in front of Yachi, he immediately grins. 

Hinata doesn’t take any heed about rushing her, nearly tackling her to the back of the sofa. It just makes her giggle and yell in surprise - as Hinata smashes his mouth against hers. It’s not bad, just eager. His kisses are not as deep, just more frequent - teasing as they pull away from her and then immediately give back. It’s much like him too. Kageyama’s kisses make it hard for her to breathe but his breathe life back into her.

“Oi,” Kageyama barks, pulling Hinata away before smacking him on the back of the head. Hinata scowls, smacking him back. Right in front of her eyes, they start bickering like they’re in highschool again. 

Yachi gives a full, belly laugh. She laughs harder than she ever has before, maybe in her whole life. It’s loud enough that the both of them start arguing, and she’s in tears by the end of it. They’re looking at her with worry when she finally gets a handle on her senses. She can’t help but keep laughing, wiping her tears stained eyes over again before talking. 

The emotions are indescribable. If she tries too, she would exhaust herself nearly to death. She is truly happy, in the most unfiltered way a person can be. The sort of happiness she could only dream of feeling as now surrounded her warmly with its comfort and soothed her. She can’t stop smiling, the butterflies in her stomach erupting so much she feels like she might be sick.

“What’s so funny?,” 

Yachi grins. Her cheeks hurt from all the smiling she’d done in the last few minutes, and she shakes her head before looking at them warmly. 

“I really love you both,” 

This time it’s different. Kageyama blushes and Hinata mirrors her smile, but in the end, they both say the same thing. 

“We love you too,” 

__ 

[ **epilogue** ] 

“Oh my god, so wait - you two both liked me at the same time? Like at the exact same time?,”

It’s the early hours now. No one has gotten any sleep. The night-time has rolled into sunrise as the three of them lay on the floor among many blankets and pillows. She’s sandwiched between the two of them, laying in Kageyama's back while her legs are tangled with Hinata in front of her. 

She’s in Kageyama's shirt and an old pair of Hinata’s shorts. She had clothes to stay the night but they both insisted on wearing theirs and it was embarrassing. She’s never felt like this before, the love between the three of them strengthened in such a short time. It makes her feel incredibly giddy.

Hinata will interrupt her randomly by kissing her, and in those moments - Kageyama will hug her tighter but smile into her neck. Everything is so light, the air in the room feels like it’s filled with perfume. It feels sweet to be in their presence. She’s never felt this kind of contentment before.

“We told each other at the same time when we started dating like a couple months in,” Hinata exclaims. Yachi’s eyes widened. 

“Tobio too?,” 

Kageyama nods into her neck, taking a deep breath as he relaxes her body. He places a stray kiss on the nape of her neck and mumbles, clearly not equipped to be awake in such early hours. Hinata and Yachi were both night owls but Kageyama goes to bed at 11 in the latest. 

“I liked you before Hinata did, technically,” he yawns. Yachi looks to Hinata who nods in confirmation, but Hinata leans in and kisses her again. He kisses the tip of her nose, and both of her cheeks before leaning in close to her again and smiling brightly. Yachi covers her face with her hands and squeaks. 

“Stop,” it comes out as a whine but Hinata just shakes his head. Hinata nestles himself in the crook of her neck. It’s so comfortable and so natural. Nothing about the moment strikes her as awkward, her heart is so calm in their presence. There are still so many questions and uncertainties, but for now this was all she could ever want. 

It’s an understatement to say she’s ecstatic. She feels like the sun will never stop shining down on her. Warmth spreads throughout her as she clings to Hinata and Kageyama, nestling herself between them as far as she can go. 

“I wish we could stay like this forever,” Yachi mumbles into the top of Hinata’s head. 

“Why can’t we?,” 

“I have a date meeting later today,” Yachi says with a yawn. Both boys snap their head up at the same time. 

“Don’t go,” Hinata gasps “You don’t have too right?,” 

Yachi scrunches her face up in confusion.

“Well, I can still cancel but,” 

Kageyama hands her her phone silently, only increasing her confusion. Hinata blushes as she looks to him for explanation. 

“Well, you’re our girlfriend now and we’re your boyfriends so you really shouldn’t,” he scratches his chin awkwardly “Yanno, go on dates and stuff,” 

Yachi’s jaw drops, but before she can say anything Kageyama is murmuring something into her neck. 

“If you need money, we can give you money so,” he trails off before finishing his sentence “Don’t go, if y-you don’t have too,” Kageyama squeezes her forearm as the both of them turn away shyly. She can’t help but blush and grow giggly but another thought crosses her mind. 

“Wait, you guys are my boyfriends? Like we’re dating now?,” 

“Well, duh. You’re our Yacchan now,” 

“Haah?,” 

Kageyama nods behind her, hugging her tighter. 

“Our Yacchan,” 

“O-Okay,” she stutters out.

She places a hand over her heart to stop it from it’s loud beating before taking a deep breath. It’s overwhelming to be with them all like this and to know that she’s their girlfriend apparently. How she landed two boyfriends when she couldn’t one after all this time manages to be beyond her. 

Nonetheless, it’s the most content she’s ever been. To be anyones and to have people who are hers. Yachi will never have to be alone again. 

Maybe she never was. 

**Author's Note:**

> comments are appreciated! thank you again everyone, and special thanks to my giftee. my heart goes out to you!!


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